The whirlpool of “what ifs” is terrible. Running around in circles of uncertainty can make even the most confident person falter their step. I’m not sure when I wrote this little piece, for I have moved far too many times to far too distant places, dreamed of it even. But now that I re-read it, the timing seems apt and a love far too real gets left behind again.
This is a part of Confessions Series. Written and forgotten in old sketchbooks, bought to life again here.
Oh, well, sometimes “it’s not you, it’s me” is the best thing we can say. Some people are born with a larger perspective so much so that they genuinely care for things that are bigger than them. Others like me get stuck in a place where you can’t look beyond reflections of oneself. This is a part of the confession series .
I found this not-so-vindictive write-up in the sketch book and I couldn’t believe that fact that time hasn’t changed me at all. I’m still this person, unwilling to be the vulnerable one. Every time somebody takes a snippet of my feelings for them, I demand to see them giving me a part of them that nobody else had a privilege to take. When we part ways because we always do, I treasure these replacements that the other person has left with me as a new version of myself.
PS: I know this post has a slightly morbid sense of being, but I assure you, most of us want this at some point or the other, this need to let the other person be hurting without our presence.
Sometimes Courage isn’t about saving others. It’s about letting go of your own insecurities and standing up for however you are. I learnt it the hard way, but I was glad I was brave enough to discover myself.
The two people I always Have a love hate relationship is with art and architecture. Architecture is like a stable marriage, you don’t hate it neither do you love it after the initial throes of passion. But art is seductive and in return it makes you constantly miserable. My choices of life always oscillate between both of these men in my life. Sigh!
When I found this in my sketch book I realized that I was much more wiser two years ago. I probably wrote this down because I wanted to tell my future self that being alone is a phase to be savored like a decadent chocolate mousse!
There are some people you can go on without ever talking. Silences with people are non-existent. Our lives are filled with hum-drum of trivialities and chatter, thus goes the confession about a rare person with whom I once shared such a beauty.